The Value of Self Care

I've had a difficult few weeks.  My powerchair broke so I spent the better part of three weeks stuck at home.  I went from going out independently at least once a day to going up to a week without leaving the house and not being able to do without struggle and help.  And it needs to be replaced. I've got a loan chair now which helps a bit but I feel a bit in limbo.  We had a death in the family too, an elderly relative whose death was expected so whilst it wasn't a huge shock it's still  tough to deal with.

And the news is full of atrocities too from the attack in Orlando to the murder of MP Jo Cox yesterday.

Bad news and difficult things wherever I turned.  It's all a bit overwhelming and upsetting and I could feel my mental health slipping.  I got rather irrationally angry about a few things that I knew would otherwise have been simple frustrations for one thing.

Now, to be completely honest I have coped with the powerchair situation much better than I could have done.  It was the whole of everything all at once and the fact that few over a week there was no sign of situations resolving that was the problem.

There is now a plan, I have a new chair on order and it's going to be better than the one I had before.  It's also going to be the colour of my choice - black! (My last chair was only available in red. It was a nice red but I would never have chosen it).  I have a loan chair so I'm getting out a bit again.  And I'm moving away from the immediate things are tough survival mindset I was in to one of self care.

Self care isn't an easy place to be because it's hard to put myself first.

I'm making plans for when I've got my own wheels.  I've decided that I need things to look forward to so I'm making sure I get them.  Plans are very rough but it looks like I'll be off to London at least twice and having a day out with my Dad somewhere else (we've decided what we'll do but where and when is up in the air).

I'm avoiding the news today because it's stressing me out.  That feels particularly wrong because I'm studying journalism, I'm supposed to be keeping abreast of the news. But it's what I need.

I'm spending long periods away from the Internet because social media especially is making my mental health worse.

I'm taking naps. Naps are good.  They feel unnecessary but I always feel better after them.

I'm trying to read or knit or do one of my hobbies everyday.

And as tough as it is I'm trying to accept that people want to help and take those offers of help up when I need to.

But I still feel that self care is something I struggle with, perhaps don't even deserve and I need to get better at it.  If anyone has any tips or tricks, they would be most welcome!

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Wonderful Things

It’s been a tough couple of weeks since my last post. Without going into too much detail, I’ve had a lot of stress and sadness going on in my life this past fortnight at work, with my own health, and with some flat troubles too. It’s definitely taken it’s toll and more than a few times I ended up just curling into a ball in bed and wishing that it could all end.

But I’m not writing this post today to tell you all how awful my life is, because, despite everything going on, my life is everything but awful. And so today I want to tell you about five wonderful things that have kept me going and will continue to keep me going.


Supportive, Loving, and Amazing Friends
I owe my friends so much. Without them, I am not so certain I would be where I am today, or if I’d even be here today. Whenever I’m feeling lonely or sad or stressed or down, I know that there is someone that I can turn to. Someone who will give me words of advice, someone who will remind me how wonderful I am, someone who will make me laugh and someone who will simply just be there. I cannot put into words how grateful I am to every single one of my friends for helping to make life just that little bit easier.

My Rock
Metaphorically speaking anyway. My rock is my mum. She is the best person I know. She is the one I always go to when I have a problem or just have something that I need to talk about with. She always sits with me as we talk everything through analytically and logically until we come up with the perfect solution. She literally keeps me together. And she has been incredibly helpful these past few weeks too. I really cannot imagine going through life without her.

Books
It’s no surprise to see this one on the list, right? What with me being a book blogger and a library assistant. But books are just so wonderful. They can help you feel less alone. They can make you happier, and they can keep you in touch with your emotions too. Books can also help you make decisions and are just incredible for taking your mind off of things too. Reading is also really good for the brain. So you really just can’t go wrong with a book.

Television *cough*Netflix*cough*
Netflix has been my saviour lately. When I’m in a really low mood, I find it difficult to read. But I can switch the TV or computer on and dive into one of my favourite shows or find a good film to immerse myself in. The best thing about TV is that it doesn’t take a lot of concentration but it can stop me from thinking too much about other things. If it’s gripping enough, I forget everything but what’s happening on the screen. It’s the perfect way to relax and just ignore everything else.

Letting Myself Feel Sad
Now, this may seem like an odd thing to be on the list but it needs to be here because I never used to do it. Being sad always felt like a weakness to me and I would pretty much force myself to feel better without really looking into my emotions and why I felt the way I did. But now I allow myself to wallow. I allow myself to treat myself to small things to make me feel better (like coffee) but I also just allow the tears to flow. Because it’s good to let it out. And once it is out, you can just get up and move on. Work out the next logical step with a clear and level-head. It is quite wonderful.



So those are just a few of the things that have kept me going these past few weeks. I could also add chocolate and coffee to this list, and cats, and funny videos and twitter… but then the list would just get a little out of hand.

Don't forget to also check out Jess' post, here about how she self-cares her mental health!

What wonderful things keep you going?

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