Monday, 29 February 2016

Single and Free

I am a person who (on the whole) likes to do things. Especially New Things. Whether this means visiting new places abroad or locally, new food flavours or new activities.

Don't get me wrong, I love doing things with my friends and they are amazing, but they don't always want to do the same things I do. And I don't want to miss out just because I don't have someone to do things with. But I have one huge bugbear, and that comes from when I tell people I'm doing an exciting thing:
"Who are you doing that with?"
Why? Why MUST there be someone else? Why do we, as a society, assume that people come in pairs or more? Why is it socially unacceptable to do things by yourself?

The thing people find most weird is when I say I am going on holiday alone. And yes, I accept that (in my experience) holidays are better with friends. But if they can't afford to go anywhere, or don't have the time, or don't want to go, then should it mean I have to stay at home until I can find someone? I don't think so.


And there are many perks of holidaying alone. I can choose exactly when and where I want to go. If I make plans but then decide to stay in bed instead, the only person I'm disappointing is myself. I don't have to rely on someone being on time, or waiting for them to get up in the mornings. Yes I would be responsible if the trip was a disaster, but I also don't have to be concerned with how much other people are enjoying themselves. There is no fear of arguments or the awkward undecisive moments (except in my own head). Being on holiday alone also gives me a chance not just to explore my surroundings, but helps me to grow as a person, discover more about myself and to gain confidence in being me. Sometimes an accomplishment can be greater if I am the sole motivator.

And yes I begrudge paying a supplement just because I'm single. But this sometimes means an extra bed to jump on which is always a bonus! And when I go for dinner and they ask if I want a table for two, I will not be ashamed that it's 'just me' and I will hold my head high when they come and take away the cutlery for my imaginary partner that is no longer needed. I've decided that I can't stop living my life because I'm single.

And just because I've decided that, it also doesn't mean I want to be single forever. But regardless, it's unlikely I'm going to ever meet anyone if I don't get out in the world. As fun as curling up in bed with Netflix is, it certainly won't help me with new experiences. I also question how happy it really makes me, when the Fear overcomes my desire to get out there. Because I do really enjoy doing things. And I actually really like doing things that are just mine and that I don't have to share with anyone else.

Because being single can be pretty great. The world is mine for the taking and a ticket for two is not a necessity.
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1 comment:

  1. YES! Thanks for this awesome post. Believe it or not, your life doesn't have to wait for Mr or Miss Right to come along. Good to see a thing about singleness that isn't about trying to not be single any more. <3

    ReplyDelete

No judgment, no hate, because it is already tough enough being a girl.